Feeling Like Myself Again

In a few days it will be 4 months since my diagnosis and I am finally starting to feel like myself again. I'm gaining my energy and endurance back and it feels great. For weeks I could hardly do household chores and I wasn't even strong enough to pick up Jackson. Thankfully, my mother-in-law came out and was a huge help! I'm not sure how I would have made it through this all without her help with the kids and house. Thanks, Lori! :)

Today is only my second day home alone with Jackson in MONTHS.

So far, so good.

I recently hosted a paint party at my home.

It was so much fun and I can't wait to do it again.

Feeling like myself again has it's pros and cons.

I'm starting to feel "normal" and my hope is rising.

That scares me.

While I do my best to stay optimistic, I'm scared to be too hopeful.

This entire experience has taught me that I am an extremely realistic person and I try to walk a fine line everyday between being hopeful and laying this all at God's feet and also keeping my feet on the ground and remembering the truths of this journey.

My doctor has a good way of balancing this, too. He encourages me to live my life and remain happy, but he casually reminds me each time that I 'have a substantial amount of disease in my abdomen'.

I'm still adjusting to being home alone with Jackson and next week I will again be adjusting to a new normal when he starts preschool. I'm so excited for this new chapter in our lives. Preschool will be good for Jackson and I can't wait to see him thrive.

xoxo