February 1, 2010

Birth Order Trends

I'm a little late, but it's time for another Question of the Week over at Multiples...and More!

As parents of multiples, it's sometimes hard to avoid comparing your kids; there's "the quiet one", the "bold one", the "bossy one", etc.

This week's question of the week is:

Describe your childrens' personalities, in birth order. Do you think your kids personalities are related to their birth order?
No! I feel as though they are individuals and no matter what way you look at it, one is always going to be the more dominate one. Mine just so happens to be the older of the two. It has been that way since birth...it's not a routine they adapted to.

Is your baby A any bolder or more dominant than B?
Yes...at times. She is the more crazy, feisty and outgoing one (once you get to know her). Baby B is more motherly and calm. Baby A is the instigator and baby B makes sure they don't get into trouble...or at least she tries. hehe.

Does your last-born reach milestones last as well?
Actually, yes! I have a theory though. Baby A is always the first to do anything physically, but she takes her time mastering it. She stood for 3-4 months before she finally took that first step. Baby B on the other hand, just got up and walked away 2 weeks after 'A' took those first steps. It's as if baby B is watching 'A' and learning from all of her mistakes before she tries. It has been this way with crawling, walking, talking, potty training...everything.

■Are there any characteristics that you feel are somehow related to birth order?
No. I do not treat them as if one is older than the other. In my mind, one minute is not enough to make a fuss over (even though I know they will when they are older). No ONE is treated differently because of that minute. They get the same bed time, rules, punishments...there is no way that any characteristics could have been formed purely off of birth order.

Do you find that a lot of people like to "classify" your kids? How do you feel about it?
Yes! Yes! Yes! Did I mention that I feel like people classify my kids? YES! If one counts to a higher number first...she is the 'smart one' even if her sister does it two seconds later. If you catch one doing something ornery...she is the 'trouble maker' even if her sister started it and you didn't get there in time to see her in action. I guess people (stranger, those without twins) feel the need to find differences between the two. It's as if they don't understand that, yes, they can both be smart, ornery, artistic, athletic...it's always 'If one is, the other can't be'.

I'll be the first to admit that, I too, have noticed myself classifying them. I, however, feel like I have the right to do so. My opinions and classifications are not based on one situation. It's based on days and days, weeks and weeks, months and months of knowing these girls. Watching them. Knowing them. REALLY understanding them. When I say 'she is 'ornery' I'm simply stating that she (in my observation) is ornery on more occasions. What that confusing? haha.
It doesn't affect my life when people classify the girls. I let them have fun trying to label them and move on with my life. It doesn't change the way I feel about them for the way that they act. I see myself having many conversations about this with the girls when they are older and have a hard time understanding why everyone always wants them to be 100% alike or totally different. I'm sure we'll stay up late on many nights talking about how special they both are and how it doesn't matter one bit what anyone thinks, as long as they are happy and know who they really are!! :)
. . .
Today is a duty day! Johnny is gone and will be home in time for dinner tomorrow. Wednesday morning he gets up and heads out to sea again. ugh! At least I get him for dinner on Tuesday...they were going to take him today!
Maybe one day I won't feel like the Navy is 'the other woman'. haha :)

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