January 3, 2012

Halloween & Randomness

I have never been so happy to see a year end and a new one begin. 2011 was a hard year for me and even though 2012 isn't starting out a whole lot better, I see the potential.

I know that when everything is said and done, 2012 will a new move, new town, new community, Johnathon's safe return, being a family again...I could go on for hours.

I just need to stay focused and remember that it will all be worth it.

I'm not going to lie, this deployment is probably the single most difficult thing I have done in my entire life. I catch myself crying at random moments throughout the day for only a few seconds at a time. I can't even bring myself to look at pictures of Johnathon or us as a family, it's too sad. I'm exhausted everyday and don't see that changing anytime soon.

I think the worst part is just being sick and tired of being alone. I just want to scream at the top of my lungs and wake up from this horrible nightmare. I hate that I am not in control of when I see him. Someone else is keeping him away and deciding when he comes home.

It's hard.

We started back up with our homeschooling. I decided to take a break when we found out that both girls needed glasses. I wanted to give them each enough time to get adjusted to their glasses and let them focus on one thing at a time. On top of everything else, it was the holiday season and we were busy enough already.

The girls were thrilled to be back in their books. I did make a few changes to our learning room/ over crowded dining room. I took their beloved desks to the garage and moved the girls back to the dining table to do their work. I know it's the boring option and not as much fun as their own individual desks, but it's what made the most sense with our current living situation. The desks will remain safe in our garage until we move this Summer.

I was shocked as I started to review with the girls and Madelynn decided to chime in. I asked Allison what letter I wrote on the white board and Madelynn said 'F'. I then asked Allison what sound it made and Madelynn continued with 'fffff'. I am one proud Momma!!

Johnathon was PTS approved last month!

That means it's time to start looking at new orders. The problem? They all seem to be over seas orders. :(

Please wish us luck and keep us in your prayers as we attempt to make this huge decision for our family.

{*The pictures are from Halloween. Alyssa was Strawberry Shortcake; Madelynn was her little sister, Apple Dumplin'; Allison was Fancy Nancy*}

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